To Kill Or Not To Kill?

The Kill (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’ s a little frustrating for me when I kill off some of the characters I don’t like in my novels. Like the current one I am writing now, I had to kill off a guy I loved ( I thought he was going to be good and then decided against it) I noticed he’s got some hidden secrets and so I just had to let him go, if he stayed, it could ruin things for a lot of people (characters).

It’s funny because I actually FEEL my characters… I often questioned their motives, behaviour and reasons they are in the plot. Boring and time-consuming isn’t it? But that’s just me, a realist fiction writer!

I was still battling with my decision when my children came back from school and they asked me about the novel, this conversation ensues between my 6-year-old daughter and myself, her name is Elizabeth.

Me: ”Hey guys, how was school today?”

Elizabeth: ” It was ok mum, how was your writing?”

Me: ”Not bad, I am thinking of killing one of my best characters,” And I told her a little about the plot (She’s written a hundred word story by the way, we’re still looking for publishers, she told me she wanted to be rich like me, I wish!)

Elizabeth: ”I think you should still give him a chance…” then there was a pause and she added, ”Don’t you think you’ll go to jail if you kill XXA (name of the character)

Me: ” No, I won’t, I created him, so I can kill him.” I explained smiling, such innocence.

My son entered my office, ( a cool corner in the house) and the expression on his face was one of uncertainty (he’s ten), he asked politely if he could give his opinion and I agreed.

Samuel: ” Why not ask your readers what they want?”

Me: ”Thanks dear, I’ll put that into consideration.”

And that ended our conversation but I was back to square one, to kill or not to kill? At the end of the day, I decided to give him another chance but I am still going to kill him, soon…

I am a very shy writer, I get so protective of my work so I won’t be asking what you guys think yet until the novel is out.

And I am feeling emotional right now, I have met some wonderful people on this blog journey. Creative, intelligent and brilliant friends and I just want to say I love you guys!

Au revoir…

I’ll be back! (Arnold used to say that in most of his films, right? How weird!)

Be The Change!

Nov6

English: Black Patent Leather Fetish Shoes 1973 – 1977 These shoes have a 7-inch stiletto heel and are a size 11 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Twenty years ago, (I was seventeen then) I was a young slim girl with long hair, skinny legs and a very big smile, I could give you anything but don’t you dare go near my shoes! And I had a lot of sisters (four to be precise) who all loved my shoes.

One weekend I came home( I just got an admission to the university then) and one of them took my shoes, the best out of about twenty pairs!

Everyone in my family knew about my addiction to this particular pair and Christy, my sister wore it to a party, even though it wasn’t her size. When I told my mom what my sister did, she’d looked at me in a very strange way. I had thought she would come to my defence and tongue lashed my sister for the invasion of my ‘privacy’, the unlawful use of my personal stuff without my say-so but nah! She did no such thing.

I knew my mom did not condone what my sister did but she had a lot to say about my reaction to it, and when I mean a lot, it could be a phrase or word loaded with meaning. Before she spoke, she closed her eyes briefly and when she opened them, there was a twinkle in her brown expressive eyes,

”Be the change in the world and you can sleep with both eyes closed.” She said simply. I didn’t understand what she meant by that statement and wasn’t ready to listen.

”But mom,” I had protested against the obvious injustice of the situation, not the lesson she wanted me to learn, ”I don’t want to change the world, just speak to Christy to stop sneaking behind my back using my things, just tell her to steer clear of my room!”

And I’d stomped out of the house, exasperated with my mom’s unrelenting idiomatic expressions, deep down I thought she was turning me into a villain for protesting but my mom is an incredibly wise woman, she knew in order for me to live in peace with my sisters and brothers, (and now my husband) I should sometimes put myself under the spotlight and see if I am the problem.

Am I been irrational, irritable, unforgiving, selfish, careless and stubborn? Well, the lists can go on and on but as I grew older and had my own family, I finally understood what she was trying to do.

My mom was training me to be a better person, not a fool that could be trampled upon but a disciplined, principled woman who would treat others the way she wanted to be treated. A woman who would respect, love, forgive and appreciate and treat everyone equally, irrespective of their race, religion or sexuality.

If every human being desires to be the change, the world would indeed be a better place. And it’s never too late, take a look at the man, woman, girl, boy in the mirror today and say to him or her ( I am speaking to you, if you’re still reading this post)

”Be the change…”

Who You Chose To Be…

Nov5

English: In January 2009, President of the United States of America, George W. Bush invited then President-Elect Barack Obama and former Presidents George H.W. Bush, Bill Clinton, and Jimmy Carter for a Meeting and Lunch at The White House. Photo taken in the Oval Office at The White House. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Life is about choices, right now in some states, Americans are already voting for their next President, the man who would lead them for the next four years. If Obama did not seek for a re-election, someone else in his party would be standing in his place right now!

But he chose to do it again. Obama could have been selling drugs but he chose to go to school, study hard and make something of his life. Romney ( I don’t really know much about him) chose to get rich and he did.

Where am I going with this you may ask? It’s simple, you can choose to ruin your life or choose to forget about the mistakes of your past, your failures, your bitterness, hurts and forge ahead to break down new barriers.

Like yesterday, I chose not to write a single word of my novel, and today I am itching to start, I can even write more than five thousand words, it’s all about choices.

You can choose to be poor by not going to work or by drinking yourself into a stupor every night, psychiatrists call that addiction right? But I call it bad choices!

And you can choose to sit tight and write a 50,000,00 word novel this month of fiction fever (NaNoWrimo) and win a publishing contract. Or maybe, self publish it and make no sales or… a lot of sales.

Life is about choices and I hope to God, we’ll make the right one today!

My Letter To Fear!

Nov3

Nothing Left to Fear (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Dear Mr. Fear,

I write to you today to let you that your hold over my life is over. I don’t hate you because in a way there are times when you actually pushed me to excel, especially in my career as a writer. And there is one aspect of you that still remains with me, which is my fear of the creator of my soul. I am in awe of Him, I love and respect Him, so you see, that is the only part of you that I can say I allow in my life.

Now, Mr. Fear, do you remember you almost killed me two years ago? That bright winter morning when I believed most of your lies that my heart would give way, even with new life growing inside me, you told me I would not hold my son in my arms and my heart was panting with the images of your lies which was deeply entrenched in my soul, till this day, it still baffles me when I allowed you in, I didn’t know when you crept in and almost crippled my faith. But you lost because I am alive!

I am here today by the grace of God, and my son has a mother standing by him, holding him and wiping tears away from his eyes when he is crying. My children have a mother they can see and touch, not the one who is in the grave.

I thank the lover of my soul who showed himself strong on my behalf. I am worthy, I am valuable and I mean a lot to my friends and family.

I guess there is nothing more to say… Actually there is, maybe someone is reading this open letter and is plague by fear. Just shake it off… Fear is a coward, it would flee!

Good bye Mr. Fear,

No Regards,

Seyi Sandra David.

Back to my NaNoWrimo novel…

Battle Of The Birds

Nov2

I was awoken from a very deep sleep with the droning voice of my ten-year old son complaining about his sister’s incessant noise. Well, I had to stand up and calm a rapidly disintegrating situation. I was up till like four in the morning writing my NaNoWrimo novel, so I was not in a very good mood.

Duck mob (Photo credit: jf1234)

And then there was a miracle, my husband had taken the day off work and skillfully rescued my life from the lion cubs (that’s what I call my children when they are in that kind of mood) by suggesting that we all go to the park.

I didn’t think it was a great idea but off we went and we had a blast! The only snag was, I left my camera at home, I would have taken pictures of how Squirrels, Ducks and Geese were battling to have a taste of the nuts my children were carrying. They did give out the nuts but it got to a stage where I was scared we would be mobbed by the ravenous birds.

My son then remarked, ”Mom, it’s the battle of the birds” And that was where I coined the title for this post.

The ducks got the upper hand partly because they were bigger and though the squirrels did put up a good fight, they were outnumbered by the ducks and geese. An hour later, we were on our way home because it was getting cold and I couldn’t help but relate that experience to life generally.

Life is incredibly hard and sometimes just surviving from one day till the next is a mammoth task but we should be very grateful to God for every little blessings!

Now, I’ll get back to my writing…

Immolation? I Hate Fire!

Nov1

Thich Quang Duc (Photo credit: HopeTom)

I saw this caption, ‘I hate fire’ embedded in a picture on a blog I visited recently and I thought, why not quickly pen this down before returning to my Nanowrimo novel.

Yes, I hate fire and it was actually strange and saddening that some people could light themselves up in protest against oppression! Don’t get me wrong guys, I am not against people demonstrating, albeit, peacefully, but burning yourself? That is a bit in the extreme.

A few months ago, I saw the picture of a Tibetan monk literally lighting himself up! He was protesting against oppression and when I did a little research, I found out the story of Thich Quang Duc, a very popular Buddhist monk revered to this day.

Early in the morning on June 11,1963 at a popular intersection in Saigon, Thich Quang Duc had made his intention known to his superiors that he was going to burn himself to draw attention to the plight of the monks who were being severely oppressed by the US-backed Catholic regime of Ngo Dinh Diem in South Vietnam.

Now I won’t bore you with the graphic details but this Duc guy died for a cause he believed in, and I can’t begin to imagine the excruciating pain he must have felt when he was being burned alive! And so… he died!

The war finally came to an end and many people attested to the fact that his sacrifice was instrumental in drawing the attention of the world to the plight of the monks, and also in a way ending the war.

I don’t encourage anyone emulating that in any way, but that is just my opinion!

Life is a mystery and we can’t understand it all…